Today I am ridiculously excited to feature one of my favorite gal pal bloggy buddies---Sarah of http://thesadderbutwisergirl.com. When I first read her blog last year, I knew I'd found a kindred spirit when it came to our wacky sense of humor. Who else but Sarah would laugh at my lame jokes and goofy memes? She gets me. I cannot tell you how many times this special friend of mine has helped me through writer's block and glitches when it comes to my lack of computer skills.
Sarah's blog ALWAYS leaves me laughing out loud and she is one of the sweetest bloggers around---always promoting everyone else's work in order to see them succeed. Even though we have never met face to face, I love her to bits and consider her one of my closest friends. Please welcome this kind-hearted, hilarious lady to my site today and be sure to show her lots of love!
Go Ahead, Roll It Over
by Sarah Almond
by Sarah Almond
When he does something nice for me, he believes that he is somehow accumulating points that could be redeemed at a later time. Kind of like frequent flyer miles, only with less interesting destinations.
Example: “In case you haven’t noticed, I haven’t played the Sims in two days. I just wanted to make sure that you’re paying attention to that. I get points for that.”
(In case you are lucky enough to live with people who don’t play video games, The Sims is a game where you tell pretend people to do stuff, like pee and eat. You know, kind of like being a parent. Fancy that.)
Example: “I’d like the record to show that I cooked dinner. Remember that, I get points for that.” (Let the record show? Are we in court?)
Points? The last time I checked, there was no points system in place in our household for much of anything. On one hand, what is he plotting? On the other hand, is this something I can take advantage of?
After much thought and scientific(ish) research, I put together a system for marriage points. I had to keep the following questions in mind:
What exactly should husbands get points for? When can he redeem these points? What can he redeem these points for? If he doesn’t redeem them by a certain date, can he roll them over?
Here is my not quite ready to be patented Marriage Points System:
1 point=Acknowledge existence of wife and children.
5 points=Pleasant demeanor around said wife and children.
10 points=Socks and underwear put in the hamper instead of in the general vicinity.
15 points=Zero mentions of football, video games, and other similar activities within a five hour period.
25 points=Cook dinner (Bonus points awarded for cleaning up afterwards)
50 points=Wash the dishes (because I really, really hate doing the dishes)
75 points=Take the children out of the house and away from the wife.
100 points=Do the things that need to be done around the house without being asked.
250 points=Send the wife out on a shopping trip that does not involve groceries or going to places with “wal” or “mart” in the title.
500 points=Leave the wife a nice note with full sentences (to-do and shopping lists do not count).
One trillion points=Arrange a date night, including making the plans ahead of time AND finding the sitter. (What? I need a night out.)
Note: Additional benefits of attempted points accrual may include happiness and extra video game playing/sports watching time.
Redemption of points is completely up to the wife’s discretion.
Accrued points may be revoked at any time per review of husband’s behavior.
So what do you say? How about we all institute points systems in our houses! What would you give points for?