My husband accuses me of talking too much, especially when I get together with my gal pals. He might be right, but I swear, there are times when I know to keep quiet. And there are plenty of sentences you will NEVER hear me say. Ever. This would include:"Can I hold your pet tarantula? He looks so cute and fuzzy."
"I'd like to purchase an airline ticket...."
"Please invite me to your baby shower so that I can watch you open 30 gifts over the course of three hours."
"Of course I'd love to go to a Miami Dolphins football game in 90 degree heat and drink a warm beer with you."
"Keep driving---I don't mind holding my leaky bladder another 50 miles until the next restroom stop."
"I can easily give up wine for Lent."
"We don't have to order dessert after dinner."
"I'd love to go swimsuit shopping!"
"Yes, I ate the entire box of chocolates by myself.""Nap? I don't need to nap. That's for old people."
"I can give up social media anytime."
"This cabbage soup diet sounds like a lot of fun."
"Sure, invite me to your Essential Oils party."
"A Cross Training program at 5:30 a.m.? Count me in!"
"I don't need under eye concealer.""Yes, let's stop dying my hair. I'd be thrilled to go natural gray."
"I don't need any more dogs."
"I'd be happy to babysit your rambunctious toddler in the hotel room while you go bar hopping for five hours."
"We should turn the thermostat up to 80 degrees to lower our monthly electric bill. A little sweat won't hurt me."
"I don't need to keep blogging because hey, who has time for humor?"
Humor is EVERYTHING. As Erma Bombeck once said, "When humor goes, there goes civilization." I couldn't agree more. Keep laughing, my friends.
