Friday, October 24, 2014

Twelve Ways To Kick Depression's Butt

I hate depression. The last thing I want to do is spend a day curled up in the fetal position  in my closet or hibernating under my bedcovers until the next lunar eclipse. I would much rather spend my time socializing at an Origami Owl convention or attending a class on fifty ways to repurpose dental floss. 

I've always suffered from depression, but a few years ago when menopause was added to the mix, it hit like a one-two punch. Depression has been like a donkey kick to my head, and each day is a struggle to find a happy balance. Short of eating my weight in candy corn and MoonPies, I've discovered twelve ways to kick depression's butt:

    

1.  Surround yourself with pets. They will love you unconditionally and never ask you for a new cell phone or an increase in their allowance.

2.  Listen to the drug-induced music of the 60-70's. Many of the songs from this era include tambourines, harmonicas and lyrics such as, "Sha-la-la-la…..feelin' groovy…" If you listen to this music long enough, pretty soon you'll be playing recorder solos better than Zamfir.

3.  Get plenty of exercise. It boosts metabolism and confidence. Take a Zumba class to shake the junk in your trunk and twerk like a pro. Don't worry if your backside looks like a butt tsunami. Ride that wave with a grin on your face.

4.  Eat chocolate. It has been proven that cacao stimulates the release of endorphins that boost the mood. Just don't mistake cacao with caca.

5.  Go for a drive along a scenic road. It doesn't matter if you're driving an outdated minivan with duct tape holding up the windshield or a transmission that acts like a bucking bronco. Be grateful that it still has air conditioning and a gas pedal.

6. Attend a sporting event, even if you hate sports. Soak up the excitement and the adrenaline of the crowd to lift your spirits. A few beers and a large bucket of chicken wings are exactly what the doctor ordered.

7.  Travel the world. Or at least cross the county line for a change of scenery. Add a little excitement to your life during your travels by canoeing in alligator infested waters. Toss your raft out into the ocean along with a bucket of chum. You'll forget how depressed you are when the sharks start circling your raft…especially once you discover it has a slow leak.

8.  Surround yourself with funny people.  Find your tribe among the jokesters and pranksters. If you're a female, be sure to carry Poise pads in your purse for those uncontrollable moments of intense laughter. 

9. Get back to nature. There is nothing more calming than sitting in a beautiful park with a granola bar and watching squirrels play with their nuts.

10. Change the decor of your home. Spend hours on Pinterest for ideas until your brain is fried and you end up covering your entire home in cheerful, Hello Kitty wallpaper.

11.  Act silly. Spend an entire day talking like Pee Wee Herman until your voice becomes hoarse and your family is ready to throttle you.

12. Learn to appreciate the little things in life and be grateful for what you have. I'm fortunate that I married a man with a great sense of humor and a deep appreciation for all that he has been given. He grew up with a mother who served her eight children cow's tongue smothered in ketchup that she tried to pass off as "Mom's special meatloaf." After one bite, my husband quickly learned to appreciate the basket of stale rolls that could have doubled as hockey pucks. 

Every day is a new challenge, but I'm ready to face whatever lemons life throws at me….as long as I have a blender, vodka and an endless supply of used dental floss to knit into Christmas sweaters. 



***Want More Meno Mama? This week you can find me on The Huffington Post where I'm sharing a comical shopping experience. Read it here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marcia-kester-doyle-/one-size-fits-none_b_6017560.html





53 comments:

  1. Depression is tough but these are great ideas to combat it... if you don't mind I'll skip the alligators ... lol

    You hubby sounds like a charm... I'm glad you found each other ♡

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  2. Me too---he is my life line to sanity and happiness!

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  3. Depression is definitely a thief that steals the joy of life. I know people who struggle, and I'm sorry to hear you face this battle as well. I love your idea about pets.. I think pets can relate to us in a way we don't completely understand, and I think you are totally right about them! (and chocolate, of course, always)

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    1. Pets are great depression therapy. I love to cuddle my fur babies on the days when I'm just not feeling it. Oh yes---chocolate works well, too!

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  4. Great tips. I know there's humor thrown in here - but professionally speaking you're hitting the nail on the head. I'm in the middle of my own seasonal-related post and will have to link over to you for good info here!!!

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    1. You are awesome! Thanks, Andrea. Let me know when your post goes live!

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  5. Hi Marcia! I really resonated with your nature idea. There is just nothing like a walk in the forest to clear my head and relax my mind (and shoulders). I know what you mean about menopause throwing a monkey wrench in the psyche. Oh yeah, being a girl is amazing isn't it?
    My mom told me that she was at a restaurant with her parents, and they ordered 'sweetbreads'. She thought they were pretty good, but then found out that name was code for 'calf brains'. NO THANK YOU!!
    Have a great weekend..take in a football game :)
    Ceil

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    1. Thank, Ceil! I certainly will----with a nice glass of pinot grigio!

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  6. Finally a way to recycle that dental floss :)
    I tried to tweet your Huffington Post article, but Chrome blocked the interface. So I just tweeted your post here.

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    1. Oh thank you, Carol! I totally appreciate the shares!

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  7. Marcia, you inspire me! Your posts are, at once, entertaining, uplifting, hilarious and (you'll hate me for this) practical. Genius, girl!

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  8. My ex did all that plus 13. Throw shit at your husband and blame him for everything that is f-ing you up, then leave and find another a-hole to abuse.

    Sorry, I'm glad you find proper outlets. That depression crap can cost others too.

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    1. So true! It can mess with the entire family balance. That's why I resort to animals, chocolate and Hello Kitty wallpaper!

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  9. Lovely list and when I first started reading I thought you wrote surround yourself with pies and I thought he - right on! But continued to read on and it said pets. Either is okay in my book ;)

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    1. Surrounding myself with pies would cure depression, too.

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  10. All wonderful advice, Marcia. I have lived with depression most of my life and I'm finding that menopause has kicked it up to the levels from when I was a teenager (at least it feels like it). I'm just better equipped to deal with it now. It makes me feel bad for the 'then' me. Poor kid.

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    1. I know what you mean…if only we knew then what we know now.

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  11. This is so funny Marcia I need to copy all of this down I riding those waves at well. I loved it!

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    1. Thanks, Rena! We are riding those waves together!

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  12. I don't generally suffer from depression, maybe because I do about half the things on your list.

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  13. Nodding my head Marcia. Especially 1, 2 and 12. Pets, nature, exercise and appreciation for what we have always bring me out of my slump :)

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  14. I've suffered from depression for my whole life as well. These are great points on how to get beyond the condition. I tend to want to be alone when I'm down, I do know that acting silly with friends can get my mind back in its right place.

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    1. Good friends and good music are mood lifters for sure!

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  15. Marcia - I think these are a must for everybody. Nothing like chocolate, pets and music to put you in a good mood!

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  16. Agree, agree, agree, especially about surrounding yourself with pets! I was never an "animal-person" growing up, but now we have a dog and 2 cats and they can cheer me up instantly.

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    1. Aren't they great? I love my little fur babies!

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  17. I'm sorry you've had to deal with depression, but it sounds like you have a good handle on it. And a sense of humor. Gotta have a sense of humor. The pets, oldies music, chocolate, and a day in the great outdoors with friends helps, too. I already do most of the things on your list, so maybe that's why depression hasn't been too much of an issue for me. Or maybe I'm just lucky. Good thing. I don't think I'm ready to knit a sweater out of dental floss.

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    1. You are on every lucky lady, Susan. Maybe I'll just mail you a dental floss sweater for a gift….

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  18. I have depression, as does most of my family, my daughter has been on anti-depression medication since she was 14 and if she stops it she is not a happy chappy and everyone around her suffer because of it

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    1. Wow--I'm so sorry to hear that both you and you daughter suffer from it. Yes--you are right---everyone else tends to suffer in the family because of it.

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  19. Sorry to hear you go through this. At least it sounds like you have a good support system to combat it. I like that you put exercise on the list. It does help from many I have spoken to.

    Also - sex! Plenty of fun sex might help too!

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    1. Oh man, why didn't I think of that??? Sex should have been at the top of the list!!!

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  20. Love this! Of course, I can't do Zumba without those Poise pants, and the chocolate afterwards kind of negates the calorie burning, but still that's not the goal here, is it? :-)

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    1. I think you just summed up a typical day in my life, ha-ha.

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  21. You do a great job of fighting it off, and you always make ME laugh so that's amazing. Lately I'm having some sort of issue with energy, as in I don't have any. Not sure what the culprit is, but all of these are great ideas! We've been soaking up all the fantastic fall weather, trying to catch the squirrels playing w/their nuts ;)
    I love that dental floss sweater! That would have come in SO handy yesterday here, we made steak and somehow ran out of dental floss. (Maybe the kids are making us presents with it?)

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    1. OMG dying laughing, Joy!! I can't LOOK at a steak without grabbing my handy container of dental floss!

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  22. Thanks for informing. I was searching for some good hosting and stumbled upon your post. The price for such good service quality is just awesome!

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  23. Squirrels nuts ... oh my. These sure are some great ways to help keep your mind elsewhere! Thank you, as always, for sharing your infinite wisdom through your hilarious way.

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    1. As long as I made you smile, I've done my job. Thank you! :)

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  24. Life is so short these days and real depression is different for many people. You've given some great tips MM, and my favourite was number 11 & 12. Just remember that if you act too crazy, the men in the little white coats may take notice, and help you towards that little box room with your name on it, ha ha ha ha.

    I'm so sorry I've not been in touch for a while, and I'm not even going to make up any stupid excuses. Reality is, life is just not the same as it was back then. And you're right 'everyday is a new challenge'. I hope to return here again soon. Enjoy the week MM, and don't go too mad with that chocolate, as it always tastes so good today but smacks you in the rear later :)

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    1. Hi RPD!!! Sp thrilled to see you here. The blogging world misses you, my friend. And I do believe I owe you a long email! Oh yes---I'll be careful with the chocolate--a moment on the lips, forever on the hips!

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  25. I like your tips.

    Especially the chocolate one.

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    1. Me too. If you have some extra on hand, feel free to mail it to Meno Mama anytime!

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  26. Wise words from the oracle, as per usual. I think I'd endorse all your suggestions, with the possible exception of the alligator-infested waters - but then again, I'm a wimp!

    Take care of yourself, Marcia.

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    1. Just make sure there are no slow leaks in your raft, my friend.

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  27. 1. Butt tsunami isn't trending on Twitter? It should be.

    2. The park is a great place to chase the blues. And my golf discs. Which sometimes fire straight at the squirrels (unintentionally, of course).

    3. I think chicken wings contain a hormone that releases happiness instantly. Science might not support this, but I do.

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    1. Totally with you on the chicken wings. They always make me feel euphoric while eating them.

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  28. Going outside always helps me, too. Unless it's freezing. Or humid and hot. But mostly other than that, going outside helps. HAHA to the Hello Kitty wallpaper and going in the ocean on a raft with chum. Nothing to remind us how much we want to live than when sharks are circling! Going to check out your HuffPo now! Congratulations!

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  29. I swear I live in the wrong state. I love snow, so what the heck am I doing in Florida? I swear, stormy weather and cold weather cheers me up, ha-ha!

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