Friday, December 1, 2017

12 People To Avoid At The Gym

     I'm an avid fan of the gym and its benefits, but sometimes I find it less stressful to do my workouts at home. There are quite a few people out there who make the exercise experience an unhealthy one for all the wrong reasons, which explains why some mornings I'm not too eager to pack my gym bag... 


1.) The overzealous spin teacher who keeps the thermostat at 85 degrees in a small, dark room that smells of sweat and the tears of unshed Starbuck's calories.

2.) Anyone named Mindy, Brittney, or Gustavo.

3.) The older gentleman known for flatulence problems who stands next to you in yoga class. Move your mat before he goes into the downward dog position.


4.) The personal trainer/health enthusiast/protein shake junkie who calls you, "Bro" and "Dude" during your 60 minute, $85 session.

5.) Excessive sweaters who blatantly ignore the box of antibiotic wipes after leaving a pool of their DNA on the elliptical machine.

6.) Women in Lululemon leggings.

7.) People who "save" their spot in Zumba class fifteen minutes early by leaving a water bottle and a towel on the floor to mark their territory in front of the mirror.

8.) The perky, twenty-something vegan pushing overly priced kale and flaxseed smoothies at the juice bar.

9.) Men who wear toupees and lurk by the inner thigh trimming machine to observe your press and squeeze technique.

10.) The grunting weight lifter who ate two, double-stuffed bean burritos last night.


11.) People who hog the treadmill while reading text messages or taking gym selfies #werkit #fierce #slay #fitbitch

12.) Anyone listening to Miley Cyrus.





Posted by Marcia Kester Doyle (Menopausal Mama) 12/1/17



22 comments:

  1. This whole list is so funny. I just avoid the gym entirely and work out in my basement.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm feeling really good about my choice to avoid them all by avoiding the gym altogether. Yep.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ha-ha! Safer to stick with online workout videos. At least that way, you can't smell the sweat through the computer.

      Delete
  3. OMG, spot on Marcia!! Heavy breathing and groaning are also a real turn off. This happens in yoga frequently and I try not to laugh out loud. I sometimes opt for an outdoor workout to keep away from other humans in small spaces LOL. Great post!

    ReplyDelete
  4. It's a funny list. I hate it when people don't wipe down machines. If I ever work out hard enough to sweat, I'll be sure to wipe down the machines.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I say you should either be subjected to a room of sweat and flatulence OR pay for the class, but no one should pay to be in a room full of sweat and flatulence. Can you tell I exercise at home?

    ReplyDelete
  6. LOL! Since I'm guilty of a few (will not tell), I refuse to work out at a gym. I'll stick to my home workouts...whenever I get to them. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, at least you can work out in you pajamas if you want to......

      Delete
  7. hahaha :D This is so funny. I don't go to the gym but workout at home. Looks like I am missing out on a lot.

    ReplyDelete
  8. LOL! I don't go to the gym but this is so hilarious I actually want to meet them. And run away after.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Bro! Come on now! We eat those burritos for breakfast before the gym workouts!

    ReplyDelete
  10. You neatly capture all the reasons why I never go to a gym. I giggled throughout.

    ReplyDelete

Shareaholic

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...