Menopausal Mother

 
    Welcome to another edition of Fly On The Wall group postings, hosted by Karen of Baking In A Tornado. Today 13 bloggers are bravely opening their doors to you so that you can be a fly on the wall in their homes.

     I'm enjoying a relaxing summer with my family despite the heat, humidity and mosquitoes. We've been spending a lot of time at the beach in the evenings where I go all "Martha Stewart" and set up a special place for us to picnic. Yes, I actually have a chandelier that hangs from my little tent along with strings of Chinese lanterns and solar lights. We play corn hole and frisbee by sunset and it is at these times that I feel truly blessed to claim this wacky tribe as my family.


     If you were a fly on the wall at our house (or at one of our beach picnics) this month, this is what you would have overheard:

"I ate too much pasta salad at the picnic tonight. I feel like I'm birthing a noodle baby."

"This website that wants to feature one of my blog posts just asked for a photo of me in my natural habitat. That means I need to send them a picture of me with a drink in my hand."

"My armpits stink so bad after being at the beach all day. They smell like sour cream and onion chips."

"I think I missed my calling in life. I could have been a competitive hotdog eater."
"Which is why you've earned the nickname, 'Beefy McSexy.'"

"I've got jello shits from the jello shots we took at the 4th of July party. Everything is coming out like a rainbow."

"Stop rolling over in bed the same time that I roll over."
"I can't help it if we sleep like synchronized swimmers."


"Some mistakes are just too fun to only make once!"

"He wants everyone to party with him every night, but he's the lone wolf when it comes to drinking shots of whiskey."

" I just found an interesting job on the internet. It calls for experience in transitioning cows, replacement heifer programming and experience in milking parlor management. I could be a dairy farmer herdsman!"
"The only thing you know how to herd are the pugs when you hustle them outside to pee."

"I don't like this new toilet paper. It's too rough, don't you think?"
"You're talking to a girl who had to wipe her backside with leaves in the Black Forest at one time, so don't ask me about texture."

"You're so A.D.D. you need to Google search for stuff in our house."

"The true definition of hell is the waiting room at the Sears automotive repair center where there's only a crappy TV and a stack of outdated car magazines."


That's pretty much a recap of my summer so far. As always, I'm living the Looney Tune life. Now go check out all the other brave ladies who are participating in today's Fly posts!


***WANT MORE MENO MAMA? I'm beyond thrilled to be featured this week on Honest Mom. I'm part of the "Speak Out" essay section with my post on "The Truth About Depression." You can read it HERE: