Friday, April 17, 2015

Fly On The Wall In A Zany Household

    Welcome to the April edition of Fly On the Wall groups postings, hosted by  Baking In A Tornado.  Today, 15 bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you'd see if you were a fly on the wall in their homes.
 
    As for my house, there has been a lot of yawning going on. Lately, I'm always tired. The Hubs is tired too, and now the teen is tired. Heck, I'm beginning to feel envious of my dogs because they get to nap all day long. I'm trying to combat my drowsiness with more coffee, but even after several cups of java strong enough to wake the dead, I'm STILL yawning at the gym and dreaming of when I can curl up on my Tempur-Pedic.

     Here's a glimpse of some odd, conversational tidbits going on around me while I was trying to sneak in a few cat naps over the weekends:


"I wish our female dog was spayed. When she gets her period, she leaves her doggy DNA all over the new carpet."

"Why don't stores sell elephant print leggings for working out?"
"Because no sane woman would wear elephants plastered all over her butt and thighs while doing squats at the gym."

"Don't bother me while I'm writing."
"Are you working on the new book?"
"Nope. This little piece is known as Book Proposal Purgatory."

"When you have A.D.D., your brain is like a computer with 20 tabs open all at once."

"You know we can't afford another car, Hon. You can still squeeze a few more years out of that 1999 Honda Odyssey minivan."
"That's easy for you to say! I'm the only man in Broward County driving the Chitty Chitty Bang Bang car from hell."

"When it comes to quality time in the bathroom, our son defies the success of any odor-eliminating spray."

"Nana, do you want a lobster roll or lobster ravioli for dinner?"
"No thank you. I don't like my lobster adulterated."

"I'm convinced that stemless wine glasses were invented for sloppy drunks."

"On Pinterest, it says that pinning a dryer sheet to your shirt will ward off mosquitoes when you're outside.  I have a better idea---just pin a poopy diaper to your hat. I'm pretty sure that would keep the mosquitoes away."
"Yeah, but then you'd be inviting the flies to a feast."

"I'm so full from dinner, I feel like someone put a sandbag in my stomach."

"It doesn't matter if you're in your 80's---you can still join a Cross Fit Class. But it will have a different name----like "Wheel Chair Aerobics" or "Walker Workout."

"If you eat that blueberry, raisin, and apple bran muffin before going to Zumba, you're going to end up with fruit flavored flatulence at the gym."

"After all the margaritas I've consumed tonight, I think the last mosquito that just bit me is going to be hungover for a week."



Buzz around, see what you think, then click on these links for a peek into some other homes:


http://www.BakingInATornado.com                          Baking In A Tornado
http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com/                          Spatulas on Parade
http://followmehome.shellybean.com                          Follow me home
http://www.menopausalmom.com/                          Menopausal Mother
http://stacysewsandschools.blogspot.com/                        Stacy Sews and Schools
http://batteredhope.blogspot.com                                   Battered Hope
http://www.justalittlenutty.com/                                  Just A Little Nutty
http://themomisodes.com                                        The Momisodes
http://www.someoneelsesgenius.com                            Someone Else’s Genius
http://gndisney.wordpress.com                                Disneyland in Kentucky
http://singlemumplusone.blogspot.com                    Searching for Sanity
http://www.angelaweight.com                                Sanity Waiting to Happen
http://thesadderbutwisergirl.com                             The Sadder But Wiser Girl
http://dinoheromommy.com/                                   Dinosaur Superhero Mommy
http://www.juiceboxconfession.com                         Juicebox Confession






52 comments:

  1. "inviting flies to the feast"....snorts out loud....

    Doggy DNA and elephant print workout pants....I can't breathe...LOL

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    Replies
    1. Hahahahaha!!! I felt the same way when I heard these comments from my daughter and my husband!!

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  2. DYING laughing!!!!! Hilarious!!
    I can empathize with the van situation. I have a 97 Grand Caravan. We call her Betty White. ;)

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    1. OMG I'm glad we're not the only ones driving an old relic!!!

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  3. Can't imagine the quick wit around your house -- everyone must be on their toes!

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    Replies
    1. The kids get it from their father---I'm not THAT quick witted!

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  4. Fruit-flavoured flatulence - now that is a phrase!

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    Replies
    1. Another great statement made by my hubs. Makes a nice tongue twister, don't you think?

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  5. Mmm, margaritas ;)
    I think elephant print leggings would be hilarious!
    We just had the "car talk" Mark's Accord just flipped 300,000 miles. I say "drive it 'til it can't drive no more!" LOL
    Hope you are doing well and smiling <3

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    Replies
    1. That's EXACTLY what I tell Hubs about our car. No new vehicle until this one croaks on the side of the road!!

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  6. I SO want a pair of elephant print leggings: "I'm not fat, it's the elephant in my pants".
    I just might get to work on an elephant leggings business proposal.

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  7. Oh, I've missed this family!!! Hung over mosquitoes. Now I've truly heard it all!!!

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    Replies
    1. They pretty much get drunk around here every weekend. Lots of mosquito hangovers going around….

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  8. ahahaah....fruit flavoured flatulence....can't stop laughing...btw, I am also very tired these days :( need more sleep....more rest...can never get enough of both :( I hope you all feel better soon and jump with bountiful of energy...cheers!

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    Replies
    1. I could certainly use the extra energy. I keep wondering if we have a touch of a bug (maybe it's the drunk mosquito???) or Hubs and I are just tired because we're OLD. The teen has no excuse, though…..

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  9. We don't have a minivan, but does our car qualify with 350K milage? I'd love to be in your head for a day, to actually see these elephant print leggings! And this Zumba dance class sounds tempting too:)

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    1. I'm totally addicted to zumba…but I'll be damed if I'll go to class in elephant leggings LOL!

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  10. I totally hear you on the doggy DNA - we have three females.

    Margaritas = our revenge on mosquitoes.

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  11. I should start doing this, capturing random quotes. I don't know if they'd be as good as what is said in your household though. This is just too funny!

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    Replies
    1. Do it!! You would be amazed at the stuff that you collect after a month. Families are FUNNY!

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  12. This makes me laugh every month. Love hearing what goes on at your house!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Lana! Come visit us sometime so you can see it first hand :)

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  13. Is the right word zany............hmmm, I'm not sure about that..................just saying, although I shouldn't since I am not all together with it myself

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    Replies
    1. Ha-ha! Well, I've used up just about every word I can think of that means "crazy" in previous "Fly On The Wall" posts. I'm running out of ideas for titles…..

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  14. HAaaaa.
    I can always count on you for a giggle.
    Thank you.
    I needed it!

    Ps. glad I don't stand by you in Zumba class!xxx

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    Replies
    1. If you come to class with me, I PROMISE not to eat any fruity muffins beforehand...

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  15. There are worse things in life than having fruit-flavored flatulence. Like regular flatulence.

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    Replies
    1. Exactly! I'd rather have blueberry farts than…well, you know….

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  16. If only eating fruit could cause us to have fruit smelling flatulence :-) lol

    Also, if the mosquitoes have a hang over the next day it should be easier to swat them...:-)

    Have a great weekend Marcia ♡

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    Replies
    1. All good points, Luanna. Have a great weekend!

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  17. Haha oh my gosh, the doggy DNA comment is hilarious!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Jen! That comment came from my oldest daughter about her pug!

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  18. Here's to mosquitos being drunk when they bite us and to awesome household stuff. Like I've said every time, I so so want to come to your house for dinner!!!

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    Replies
    1. And I sooooo want to meet you IRL. PLEASE come to Florida!!!! I just KNOW you and I would become besties if we ever got to meet each other and talk for a few hours!

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  19. What a fun family. You'll never run out of blog material!

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  20. Despite the yawning I still get the feeling that your house is never a boring place. :)

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    Replies
    1. Sadly, my family is at their LOUDEST when I'm trying to sleep, too!

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  21. I'll simply comment with "I love my adopted family!" lol

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  22. I'm picturing Mac with a poopy diaper full of mosquitoes strapped to his hat. lol Pug DNA - ack! Ours used to emit this smelly awful goo from their butts when they sat on our laps. I know - gross! I love when you do these fly on the wall posts Marcia. You guys are hilarious!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Linda! It was my daughter's pug that was having a period, Thankfully, my babies have been spayed and neutered.

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  23. We're still driving a 1997 Toyota -- feeling better about that now:)

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    Replies
    1. Wow!!!!! I think you must have the ORIGINAL Flintstone mobile!!

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  24. It's always a treat to stop in and see how you are doing, I always get a good laugh!

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  25. Fruit flavored flatulence would always be better than the regular stuff, and just think, after taking a poop no air freshener spray would be needed!

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  26. I can so relate to the computer with 20 tabs open. THat's exactly how my ADD mind works...or "doesn't work."

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    Replies
    1. I cannot imagine living like that, but in a sense I already am--with my husband, I have to constantly help him stay on track---he gets distracted sooooo easily!

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