Every now and then I enjoy looking back on past Fly On The Wall posts and reading some of the funnier comments made by family members. Today, I'm sharing my favorites from 2016 (with the startling realization that not much has changed around here in four years---my family is still nuts).
SON: (attempting to iron his shirt) "Who the heck put the iron setting on wool, for god sake?"
HUBS: "I did. I ironed sheep yesterday."
INSURANCE SALES REP: (on the phone with my husband): "Mr. Doyle, I'll need you to sign the insurance documents we sent to you, then scan and email them back to me. You do know how to do this, right?"
HUBS: "Are you kidding me? My wife and I are so old, we still use Wells Fargo to deliver everything by horse."
HUBS: "For us, the saying 'Ride or Die' is the equivalent of sitting in a motorized wheelchair and pretending we're Peter Fonda reliving his role in Easy Rider."
HUBS: "Isn't it cool to think we're staying at a hotel on Aviles street---the oldest street built in the U.S.?"
ME: "As old as you are today, I would think you'd recall watching them build it."
HUBS: "You carry enough cheese sticks in your purse to open your own dairy farm."
ME: "There's some leftover steak in the fridge if you're hungry."
HUBS: "No thanks. I still have a couple of hooves in me from last night's dinner."
ME: "Look at that giant harvest moon!"
SON: "What is it harvesting?"
ME: "Your brain cells."
HUBS: "That will be a small harvest...."
HUBS: "You know you're old when you have to drive with a knee brace on."
ME: "Why are you breathing so heavy?"
HUBS: "I'm practicing Lamaze for when I give birth to my holiday food baby. "
SON: "The hot dogs have gone rogue. They abandoned their packaging and fell down into a bin at the bottom of the fridge."
HUBS: "Yeah, I know about that bin---our refrigerator is an official wiener collector. "
ME: "Why do you take a nap on the couch an hour or two before going to bed at night?"
HUBS: "It's a part of my 'Pre-Sleep' ritual."
HUBS: "I ate too much of that Cuban picadillo tonight. I'm crop-dusting beans and rice everywhere I walk. "
ME TO MY DAUGHTER: "Of course I won't tell anyone what happened. I understand the girl's code of silence."
HUBS: "Since when do girls know how to keep silent?"
My husband just might be right about that. After all, nothing is too sacred when it comes to these Fly On The Wall posts....
****WANT MORE MENO MAMA? You can find my latest work for CONSIDERABLE here: https://www.considerable.com/contributor/marcia-kester-doyle/
Buzz around, see what you think, then click on these links for a peek into some other homes:
Baking In A Tornado https://www.BakingInATornado.com
Never Ever Give Up Hope https://batteredhope.blogspot.com
Menopausal Mother http://www.menopausalmom.com/
Spatulas on Parade https://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com
My favorite (of your favorites) is the insurance sales rep conversation ('cause it could be us) and your husband's comment about the cheese in your purse (personally, I carry hard candies).
ReplyDeleteIt's a good thing you carry hard candies instead of cheese sticks. That way, if you forget that you have them, they don't get rotten over time....like the cheese in my purse....
DeleteWearing my knee brace as I am reading this! But it's not age - it's falling down the stairs -- or was that because I'm old???
ReplyDeleteLOL mu hubs has bad knees from an old injury.
DeleteOh lawdy I almost spit water! Crop dusting beans and rice LOL
ReplyDeleteDawn aka Spatulas On Parade
Pretty much everything my hubs says is funny. Never a dull moment with that one.
DeleteA bloody good laugh and it felt good
ReplyDeleteI love hearing that!
DeleteAlways hilarious. I just love your family! I want to be that fly. :D
ReplyDeleteYou are always welcome to visit!
DeleteToo funny! Love the Ride and Die comment.
ReplyDeleteMy husband always says the funniest stuff.
DeleteI so get your family!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you do!
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