Menopausal Mother

     Welcome to a new edition of Fly On The Wall group blog postings, hosted by Karen of Baking In A Tornado. Today, seven bloggers are opening the doors to their homes so that you can get a glimpse of their private lives as if you were a fly on their wall.

     This month has been all about spending time with loved ones as our backyard is being transformed into a magical place for family and friends (pictures soon to follow). Listening in on the conversations around me is always a good way to gather fodder for these FOTW posts, but my family knows what I'm up to when they see me scribbling notes during dinner. Here are a few bits and pieces of conversation that I snagged from these gatherings:



"I'm not upset or too anxious-----I'm taking prescription medication to help me relax."
"Too bad it's not working."

"There's some leftover steak in the fridge if you're hungry."
"No thanks. I still have a couple of hooves in me from last night's dinner."

"I need to change the channel to something less scary than this presidential debate. I'm switching over to watch American Horror Story. Definitely less frightening."

"We're in a restaurant for God's sake, please stop farting!"
"I can't help it if the owner called me in to defog the place. My gas is lethal enough to kill the cockroaches."

"Having Carpal Tunnel in both wrists really sucks. I have to wear a brace on each one. My arms look the robot's arms on Lost In Space. 'Warning, warning, Will Robinson---Carpal Tunnel ahead. Danger, danger!'"

ME: "Look at that giant harvest moon!"
SON: "What is it harvesting?"
ME: "Your brain cells."
HUBS: "That will be a small harvest...."

"What on earth was that horrible screaming I heard outside?"
"I don't know but it sounded like someone stepped on a cat."

"I ate so much food at dinner that my belly button is now an outie."

"Our granddaughter is afraid to use the bathroom at night because she said she's scared she'll see a 'conch' roach."
"Tell her that 'conch' roaches only exist in Key West."

"They're selling Smart Water here. How much should I buy?"
"A case, because you're gonna need to swim in that stuff in order for it to work...."


     It's all fun and games at the Doyle house until someone has to deal with gastrointestinal issues. But at least it keeps the cockroaches away.....