Friday, September 20, 2013

Fly On The Wall In Bonkersville

   
 It's everyone's favorite blog post time of the month---Fly On The Wall, hosted by Karen from http://www.bakinginatornado.com. I might as well rename this post, "Mosquito On The Wall," because we still have armies of the tiny, blood sucking vampires camping out in our yard. They're privy to everything that goes on in Bonkersville, and no matter how much Deet is sprayed, they keep coming back for more. They're harder to exterminate than the zombies in The Walking Dead.  But before I reveal any family secrets, please show Meno Mama some love by visiting my NEW post being featured at http://www.inthepowderroom.com/read/momsrock/2013-09-6-good-things-about-raising-teenage-girls.html. Remember the one I wrote last time about raising teenage boys? This is the sequel---a humorous spin on raising teenage girls! Those little Facebook, Twitter and Google + icons at the bottom of that post---click on them and please SHARE, SHARE, SHARE!! Meno Mama needs your support. Thank you!

     Here are some snippets of conversation a mosquito (or fly) would have heard if he was lucky enough to survive a day in my home:

*  "You're the only kid I know who would go on a cruise ship and play the Titanic theme on his recorder as the boat was pulling away from the dock."

*  "When I returned the wood shelf to Lowe's, the clerk asked me what was wrong with it. I told her it was too wide and too long....and that normally I don't have that problem...."

*  "Nap? Of course I didn't get to nap! How was I supposed to sleep next to a farting pug who wears a pee-soaked doggy diaper?"

*  "Turn up the fan---I have clammy butt syndrome."

*  "What were you doing at Dairy Queen?"
     "Trying to inflate the spare tire around my waist."

*  "I have a stomachache---like hot, burning gas. My butt feels like it's on fire. What does that mean?"
    "Lay off the Mexican food."

*  "No, I don't want a hard boiled egg and a grilled chicken breast in my salad. That would be like eating the mom and her baby on a bed of lettuce."

*  "Why does the house always smell so bad after you vacuum it?"
    "Because somebody was too lazy to wipe up the dog puke and decided to save time by vacuuming it  instead.  It's no longer a vacuum. It's a dog barf sucker."

*  "Why did you buy Captain Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal? That stuff is my kryptonite!"

*  " I ran into Bob at Lowe's today. He asked me what I was doing in the hardware aisle. I told him I was looking for food for our new, pet goat."

*  "I'm not getting out of this bed until my minions bring me some coffee."
    "Honey, we don't own any minions."
     "Yes we do----they're called children, and the chief minion's name
is "Husband-Who-Runs-With-Coffee."

*  "If you keep eating those pumpkin donuts and drinking those pumpkin lattes from Dunkin' Donuts, you're going to end up with pumpkin thighs."

*  "Did you just throw up?"
    "I had to. That chicken sandwich I ate earlier sprouted wings and needed to fly."

*  "I had so much whiskey last night that I almost went to the free clinic to donate my hemorrhoids for scientific research."


     Now that you've been privy to the craziness going on in Bonkersville, please check out all the other bloggers brave enough to participate in today's Fly On The Wall series!



http://BakingInATornado.com                                      Baking In A Tornado
http://www.justalittlenutty.com/                                 Just a Little Nutty
http://followmehome.shellybean.com                           Follow me home . . .
http://stacysewsandschools.wordpress.com/                Stacy Sews and Schools
 http://thesadderbutwisergirl.com                               The Sadder But Wiser Girl
http://menopausalmother.blogspot.com/                    Menopausal Mother
http://mooreorganizedmayhem.blogspot.com/             Moore Organized Mayhem
http://hypnoticbard.blogspot.com/                             The Insomniac’s Dream  
http://themomisodes.com/                                        The Momisodes
http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com/                       Spatulas on Parade
http://singlemumplusone.blogspot.com                      Searching for Sanity
http://www.therowdybaker.com                                  The Rowdy Baker
http://www.bethteliho.wordpress.com/                         Writer B is Me 
http://sorrykidblog.com/                 Sorry kid, Your Mom Doesn’t Play Well With Others


64 comments:

  1. I love this. You make me feel so much better about the conversations that go on in my house.

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    Replies
    1. Hahaha I think we're all in this together!

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  2. So, should I ever make my way to S. Florida for a visit with my fam, can I come spend a weekend with you? LOVE YOU GUYS! My adopted internet family..........and I just made myself sound like a stalker! haha

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    Replies
    1. Sarah, I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to meet you!!! I have an extra room here anytime you want to swing by! XO

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  3. I always look forward to your Fly posts!!! I wanna come and hang out at your house!!! I would feel so at home! LOL ;)

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    Replies
    1. I think we should have a yearly Fly On Te Wall convention at each blogger's home. I'll take the first round--how about that?

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  4. I always look forward to reading about what crazy stuff goes on at your house. Makes me feel so much better about mine. Sorry, but there's comfort in not being the only one.

    Love, love, love that pic of you and hubs.

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    Replies
    1. I can assure you that you're in good company!

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  5. I came here by way of In the Powder Room. This post had me laughing out loud. I am going to read your older post. Thanks for the great laughs.

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    1. Welcome, Amanda! I'm so thrilled you found me on ITPR and stopped by! Please come back again--all kinds of crazy going on here!

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  6. First of all, LOVE your new profile picture. And, I always say Mexican food is the best tasting laxative EVAH!!!!!! Sure the ass on fire is a pain in the butt, but it works like a charm every time.

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  7. Hey, I have pumpkin things!! Dunkin Donuts just opened here last month...I've already been there too many times :) When I come to your house, I'll bring ice for the drinks AND the clammy butt syndrome <3 you.

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    1. I'll make sure all the fans are on when you come over haha! Love you!!!

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  8. And now I must have Captain Crunch Peanut Butter and Pumpkin everything from Dunkin Donuts....

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    Replies
    1. I 'll meet you at the Captain Crunch Cereal Addicts Anonymous meeting later tonight!

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  9. Husband-who-runs-with-coffee and eating a mom and her baby on a bed of lettuce... too much awesome for words.
    I love your family!

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    Replies
    1. Lol glad you liked it, Meg. I really CAN'T eat a salad with chicken breast AND egg on it---something just not right about that!

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  10. I LOVED it!!! I almost spit tea on my computer screen!!!!

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    1. Uh-oh--better cover your computer with plastic next time you read my blog, LOL! Thanks--glad you enjoyed it!

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  11. LMHO - you're just too funny - ( by the way my vacuum smells like dog too - rotten dog )
    XOXO

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    Replies
    1. HAHAHA!!!! Glad I'm not the only one with a foul smelling vacuum!!!

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  12. thanks so much for the much needed giggles! your family sounds awesome!

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    Replies
    1. They are a LOT if fun and always keep me smiling! Thanks for stopping by!

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  13. OMGosh I am so glad I had just taken a bathroom break. Otherwise this ROTFL would have had tears running down my legs!!

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    Replies
    1. HAHAHA I'm glad you got to the bathroom first, too! Thanks for stopping by!

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  14. I just love your family so much, Marcia! I'm dying over here.

    I am STILL waiting for you to adopt me and The Tinys. I swear we were separated at birth.

    <3

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    Replies
    1. You know my door is ALWAYS open to you and The Tinys! XO

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  15. Even with the crazies I live with I'm afraid I can't compete with that! Hil-ar-i-ous! I would MURDER any kid who vacuumed up dog puke though.

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    Replies
    1. I don't blame you---my vacuum will never be the same.....

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  16. Replies
    1. Thanks for stopping by Jen, and glad you liked it!

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  17. As usual, you gave me a good wake up coffee call with a barrel of laughs. Those mosquito's must be drunk on the blood of your Bonkersville house. That's why you can't get rid of them. Deet is not strong enough. They are calling the whole mosquito community/village over to witness what goes on in your crazy home. I too would risk being sprayed like mad, or swatted to see it with my own eyes, ha ha ha.

    I'll pop over to the powder room too, a little later. I must see what's going on with those teenage ladies.

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    Replies
    1. You definitely have to see it to believe it, RPD. I would love it someday if you could!

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  18. I JUST LOVE VISITS WITH YOUR FAMILY!!!

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  19. P.S. And that last picture of you and your husby? Adorable!!!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you! We were having so much fun that night---we went to an Ice bar in Orlando and had an incredibly good time!

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  20. Marcia, you crack me up... oh my goodness... I don't know which one was the funniest... as I laughed through the whole post but I did get a charge out of the one who played the Titanic music on the ship... hahaha... very popular :)

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    1. I couldn't believe my 17 yr. old son did that! How embarrassing! But yeah...it IS pretty funny!

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  21. I love your home!!! HILARIOUS!!!!

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  22. Replies
    1. As crazy as out family is, there are plenty more stories where these came from!

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  23. Uh-oh, what do pumpkin thighs look like? I love those pumpkin things too! I guess I'm doomed! I love your weird funny family! XO!

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    Replies
    1. I'm addicted to any and all things pumpkin. But I have a pumpkin sized stomach instead of pumpkin thighs!

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  24. Really appreciate this post. It’s hard to sort the good from the bad sometimes, but I think you’ve nailed it!!!

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  25. The chicken sandwich line is a riot! You have a fun family! (And I love the pug pillow!)

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    Replies
    1. Isn't it cute? The Hubs gave me the pillow a few weeks ago!

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  26. Now it's "Bonkersville?" LOL!!! Enjoyed as usual, Slu

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    Replies
    1. It's always Bonkersville in the Doyle house LOL!

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  27. Hi MM! I also love that name "Bonkersville". I don't think I'll look at my salad with egg and chicken the same way EVER again. I love Captain Crunch cereal, it just doesn't love me. It rips the heck out of my mouth!

    Entertained as always, my friend!
    Ceil

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    1. Seriously--I cannot eat a salad like that. It's just too weird to me. That's a shame about the Captain Crunch cereal---I have to have my fix every now and then!

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  28. I love these posts! I'll be joining up again next month!

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  29. You have forever ruined my favorite salad for me! I never, ever put it together that I was eating two generations of chickens. Sigh. Other than that? Damn funny!!!

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    1. Hahaha sorry--hope I didn't ruin your appetite!

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  30. I don't have crazy conversations like this because the cat refuses to engage in witty repartee with me ;) Love that line about eating the mama and her baby on a bed of lettuce!

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    1. I was so grossed out when The Hubs handed me that salad. No WAY was I going to eat that combo! There's something about that....that's just not right.....

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  31. LOL, I had that clammy butt feeling last night, I can't stand that because it causes you to go dry off.

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    1. HAHA!!! I hate that feeling. Makes e just want to run around without any underwear...but I can't do that with kids in the house!!

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