Friday, September 4, 2015

Eight Types Of People Who Annoy Me


    The best thing about the human race is our individuality. The world would be a dull place indeed if we all dressed the same, talked the same, and shared identical opinions on everything from ice cream flavors to presidential candidates. Our uniqueness is what makes us interesting.

     While I respect individuality, there are also certain types of people who annoy the hell out of me. Their "uniqueness" doesn't jive with my own personality flaws (which include impatience, irritability, and a short attention span), and they bring out the worst in me. They make me feel stabby, which is never good for someone who is going through menopause.

     If you fit into one of these categories, stay far, far away from me. Or better yet, hide your forks.


THE MOTORMOUTH: This is the person who never knows when to stop talking. There's a tiny motor attached to their mouth and it's set on warp speed. Their incessant chatter triggers an instant headache while I'm trying to process the minute details of a story they're eager to share. I'm not interested in hearing "101 fun facts" about your new turbo vacuum. Nor do I need to know the name of every dairy cow that contributed to the chunks of imported cheese behind the deli counter.

INDECISIVE PEOPLE: I refer to these people as "wafflers." They can't make up their mind about ANYTHING. Ever go out to dinner with these people? If the restaurant has an extensive menu, you might as well bring a sleeping bag because you'll be camping under the table for days.

A waffler will agonize for hours over the abundance of food choices. Fried calamari or beef sliders?  It's impossible for these people to make it through a four-course meal because the restaurant's kitchen closes at midnight. For the love of all that is holy, pick the damn calamari and call it a night.

BRAGGARTS: Whenever you share a personal victory, these people like to pipe in about something BETTER that happened to them. They could care less about your trip to Wally World last summer because they were busy partying it up in Monaco. And even though you're proud of the 5K race you ran last weekend, the Braggart is quick to remind you that they ran a 10K race in 102 degrees… uphill. Both ways.

NEGATIVE PEOPLE: No matter how much positivity you try to send out into the universe, negative people will find something wrong with the very things that make you the happiest.

"I just got a promotion at work!"
"Say goodbye to your social life because you'll probably have to work nights and weekends from now on."

"I just bought a new car!"
"I heard there was a recall on that model."

Carry an umbrella when you're around these people, because they will always delight in raining on your parade.

THE CHRONIC COMPLAINER: This person is impossible to please. Nothing is good enough, and fault can be found in just about everything. Their boss is a jerk, their spouse is a slob, their kids are unappreciative, their rent is too high and they have mysterious illnesses that keep them from enjoying pretty much everything in life. Whatever you do, NEVER ask a chronic complainer how their day is going. An ear full of wax is preferable to an earful of misery, which is what these people will give you.

KNOW-IT-ALLS:  My biggest pet peeve is with people who think they know EVERYTHING. Heck, they don't even mind telling me how to run my life. If I ask for your advice, great. Give it to me, and chances are I might actually follow it. But when someone steps into my personal territory and tells me how to do something that I feel I have already accomplished on my own, the claws come out. Unless you've discovered a more efficient way to plunge a toilet without splash-back from a fecal bomb, then please keep your opinions to yourself until I ask for your advice.      

UNRELIABLE PEOPLE: Don't promise me that you're going to do something…..and then bail on me. Don't change plans at the last minute, either---this messes with my OCD. If we have plans to go to dinner at 6:30 and you don't show up until 7:15, I might have to start the party without you. Which means I might be a hot mess by the time you arrive.


OVER-THE-TOP INDEPENDENT SALES ENTHUSIASTS: I get that you have a job to do, but please stop pressuring me to buy your nail sticker designs, powdered shakes, knock-off designer bags, miracle skincare products, prepackaged diet food or emoticon-shaped jewelry. If I win the lottery and can afford all of these products, I'll let you know. Otherwise, back off…..unless you're selling baked goods. I'm always ready to shell out money for a good cupcake.

     What type of people annoy you? Oh wait, let me guess…..people who make lists of the people who annoy them the most.


***WANT MORE MENO MAMA? This week I'm featured n BLUNTmoms with my post, "8 People I Love To Hate At The Gym." You can read it here: http://www.bluntmoms.com/8-people-love-hate-gym/




67 comments:

  1. Bahahaha! So many people annoy me. I could write a book!
    But yeah, I can be a know it all (so says my husband).
    And I'm the queen of flaking because I have severe social anxiety disorder.
    I'm telling you folks, I'm not that great off paper. Haha

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    1. I'm betting you're hilarious in real life!

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  2. Some I'd add to the list: The Oblivious Ones (you know, the folks who stop with their carriage in the middle of the supermarket aisle or at the top/bottom of escalators); The Snobs (especially wine/food snobs); and The Self-Absorbed (who consistently turn around everything you say and make it about them).

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    1. I don't like those types, either. I see a blog sequel in my future.

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    2. Oh my GAWD, YES! The Oblivious Ones make my eye twitch! For example, I was holding the door for a lady, then more people came out after her while I'm still holding the door. Not a single one of them said thank you! I couldn't believe it. I'm not the effing doorman people! You know, I guess these people could be a toss up...Oblivious or just assholes.

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    3. I can't stand people like that! I feel so bad if I see a nice man holding open a door for women and they just march right past without saying a word! GRRRR!

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  3. OMG, Marcia, I am so with you! Here's my request: will you publish another post: "how to deal with those people". Please?

    PS: I have some individuals to add...

    Complicated / overly thorough
    Yes, I know that I am impulsive, and when I want something I want it now, and I am aware that sometimes it’s wise to take a step back and consider all the aspects and consequences, yadayada. Just how many times does one need to check and re-check? Get on with it already, I’m dying here! Also there is no need to repeat what we have just discussed five times, “just to make sure”. I say JUST DO IT!!!

    Back-stabbing bitch
    „Thanks for letting me know. As your boss, I appreciate the heads-up. I completely understand that you don’t want to broadcast your early pregnancy just yet considering you were having trouble getting there. Your secret is safe with me.” 5 minutes later people start congratulating me. What part of keep your mouth shut didn’t you understand???

    Profiteers
    Don’t you love to hear from people out of the blue? Don’t you just love hearing how you can help them this time? Not.

    Attention seeking
    “I’ve got a question” – no, actually they have no questions. They just like an audience on whom to dump their unimportant “information”. Also they don’t want your advice or help, they just need you to listen to them.

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    1. Yes, yes, YES! ALL of these types drive me crazy!

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  4. Thank you for addressing the Over the Top Independent Sales Enthusiasts! OMG these are outright my top pet peeves. I have an acquaintance (refuse to call her a friend anymore) who I have not spoke with since last December! She cold calls me about a new business venture she's getting into and would like me to help her out. Seriously? We haven't spoken since December, and even the December convos were about your business.

    Anyways, addition to your list after my venting. I think this would fall under the final one: Cold Calling Sales People. This goes for all businesses. Not just the SAHMs trying to bring in extra cash, but fully fledged businesses that call even after you've asked not to be contacted again.

    Another one: Lazy Coworkers. These people make themselves seem busy, but never accomplish anything. And more than that, you have no idea what they're doing all day!

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    1. Another group I don't like--yes! And those lazy coworkers? They're taking numerous coffee breaks and pit stops by the bathroom so that they can check their cell phones.

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  5. haha I was nodding along, laughing, saying yes as I read this!

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    1. Yep---lots of these types of folks around.

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  6. I'm embarrassed to say I've probably been guilty of all of these at one time or another - ack! I'm such a planner that the people who consider schedules a "loose guideline" are tough for me to be close friends with. I'm sure they would say Im too uptight!

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    1. I'm the same way---I like people to be punctual and when they're not, it makes me nuts.That's why I start the party without them.

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  7. Loved, Loved, Loved this post! I can definite name a few people I know who fit into a category or two. And to be honest I can see a couple in myself as well. I am working on my negativity, but that one is me. I hope I don't annoy you too much, lol.

    But to add to this list:
    How about the people who think they are always right and you have to fight tooth and nail to prove to them when they are wrong? This extremely irritates me, but thankfully there is Google!

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    1. I just had this situation with someone. She started putting me down for stuff on my blog and I wanted so badly to say, "Bitch, please. You've only been blogging for a little while. Let's compare numbers..." Well, that's what I said in my head, anyway I'm too nice to say it out loud, LOL!

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  8. The Chronic Complainer is really hard to be around. It's so frustrating that after everything you do to accommodate them, they're still not happy.

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    1. Isn't that the truth?? They're just not worth your time.

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  9. I avoid these types at all costs. At my age I'm smart enough to leave them to stew in their own juices.

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    1. I agree, Jennifer. One more benefit of being older & wiser :)

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    2. Jane and Jennifer, what is your blog URL? I'm trying to find you so that I can read your blogs.

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  10. The funny thing about this list? I think I'm guilty of all these different characteristics! I guess the negative people bother me a lot because it just seems mean to not be happy for others and to dull their happiness. It reminds me of Debbie Downer - have you ever seen that? Saturday Night Live?

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    1. Yes---Debbie Downer--that was the name I was looking for---or the other one--- "Negative Nancy."

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  11. Bob, the Angry Tomato had an answer for this: The 'Kill Everyone' button. :)

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  12. Good news, I don't think I'm any of those people. If I had to pick the closest to any of them, I'd go with the "negative" people type. But unlike the ones you mention, I rarely if ever, rain on anyone's parade. But if you tell me, "Don't worry, I'm sure you'll meet someone." I'll most likely reply, "Yea, right! I'm not going to hold my breath".
    Funny thing is, I've listed just about all these people myself in my r.a.n.t. articles. So yes, these people annoy me too.

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    1. Seems like we have some things in common---I'll have to check out your r.a.n.t. articles!

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  13. My biggest pet peeve is dishonesty. Once I catch someone in a lie, I cannot force myself to trust them again. They talk and all I hear is "bla bla bla, this may be true or not you'll never know, bla, bla, bla."

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    1. Absolutely. I usually just plaster a fake smile on my face, nod my head and then slowly back out of the room while they're talking.

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  14. I absolutely positively HATE negative people!! I'm generally a positive person and any time I'm around a negative person, they try to drag me down.

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    1. Negative people don't want to wallow around in their own negativity---misery loves company, after all.

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  15. Omg. This was awesome. Thanks for sharing.

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  16. I am very put off by people who have neat desks and iron everything. And continually talk about (motor mouth) how much ironing they did (braggart). And after they've bragged about it for a while, they start complaining about it. Before you know it they have become one of the MOST annoying people - the martyr. With a shamefully neat desk. Disgusting.

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  17. Only 8? The sunny back stabber . I am usually sucked in by their sunny disposition and then the knife goes in. Example : me- 'How's your day?' Them- 'Fantastic day, God is rejoicing us with his joy. Oh right you don't believe , well the sun will still shine on you too.'

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    1. Those types of people drive me to detraction, too. Clearly I need to write a sequel list to this one ;-)

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  18. I read the title of this post, and said to myself, "How can she come up with EIGHT different types of people who annoy her?" And then, as I was reading the list, I found myself going, "Yes! Yes! So and so is just like that and I can't stand it!" So, thanks for enlightening me to the fact that I might be a little stabby myself. ;-)

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    1. Ha-ha! I'll bet if you start thinking about it, you'll come up with some more types. The list goes on and on for me, which is why I think I need to write a part #2 to this post.

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  19. I agree to all of these Marcia! Your descriptions were hilariously true. The last one, is on social media a little too much for my taste. I think the ones who are always asking for favors, either in person or on the internet...and they are never around when you need them.Great post! Happy Friday.

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    1. Isn't that the truth? And I hate getting all of these invites to online "parties" for items people are trying to sell.

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  20. You've sure hit the nail on the head with these annoying types. I wonder which categories I fall into.

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    1. Ha-Ha! I think we ALL have a little bit of each of these types in us.

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  21. Don't forget the grammar Nazis. Those that need to point out every little spelling and punctuation error whether it's the written or spoken word. Those people drive me nuts!

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    1. Plenty of those to go around .The only time I want to be around one is when I'm having them edit my work!

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  22. People that are always happy piss me off. Peppy just wears me down...Cheerleader tryouts ended in High School.

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    1. Gawd yes. Those are usually hyper people on a caffeine high. They make me nervous.

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  23. Omygosh,

    I love this and I might steal for a blog post and give you credit, of course, if that's okay. AM I talking too much?

    Haa. I agree. It's like- FINISH the f*cking story about the vacuum cleaner, pleeease. I'm growing old here!

    I get fed up w/ people who don't listen. I'll be talking and they're glancing at their phone or around the room. EXCuuuuse me, Am I boring you?

    Those are not DEF. NOT my 'Wine friends."

    Also, These people are assholes!!

    ***They could care less about your trip to Wally World last summer because they were busy partying it up in Monaco.***

    SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!

    thanks for the giggle, Marcia. xxx

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    1. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! You are welcome to do whatever you want on your blog, my dear. I love you to bits, which means you can do no wrong in my eyes. XO

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    2. Hi there! I would definitely have to agree with you when it comes to people who don't really listen! It drives me bat shit crazy, especially when you make it a point to pay attention to them ramble on about the highlights from their scrapbooking retreat weekend! Grrrrrrr...

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    3. "Scrapbooking weekend"-----HAHAHAHA!!!!

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  24. ERGAWD!! All of these people annoy the crap out of me! As I was going down your list I was like "yup that one is the worst! Oh wait, no a knowitall is even worse than a waffler but is the braggart worse than both of them?" LOL they all stink. I think though that the EGO is the most annoying. Because duh - we are so much better than they are (kidding! sortof!). Great post!

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    1. There are soooo many more who drive me crazy, too!

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  25. Had to share this one! Very relatable!

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  26. I love uniqueness on people too but some of them can drive the best of us batty... my least favorite person are the ones you can't ask a simple question of without them tearing your head of... I want to say lighten up... very frustrating ...

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    1. YES! Seems like they're always in a bad mood or in a rush---they can't be bothered to help others.

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  27. Hi Marcia,
    Worst part - I know a person who embodies all your types (and well for clarity it's not me:) Negativity and complaining brings me to boil. I mean I suffer through my menopause with a smile on my face:))
    Loved your post!

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    1. Thanks, Abby! Wow--I can't imagine being around someone who embodies ALL of these traits. Yikes!

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  28. I hate several of the types of people you've mentioned, but honestly I am not a people person so everyone sort of annoys me! Great post!

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    1. Ha-Ha most people annoy me, too! This list could go on and on and on…..

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  29. LOL! I think I've become a motormouth since living in Germany. If I find someone else who speaks English, watch out, I'll trap them into talking to me.

    I love indecisive people, especially when you ask them what they want to do. They say they don't care, and when you start giving suggestions, they don't want to do any of them. What do they mean when they say I don't care.

    I call the braggarts the one-uppers. They always have to one-up you. I got a new car. Well, our new car is the top of the line.

    Great list. Thanks for sharing.

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    1. Thanks! My husband always asked me to make the decisions about where we are going on the weekends, and then when I give him a few suggestions, he turns down each one of them. He is very indecisive about stuff like that and it drives me nuts!!

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  30. Hi there Marcia! I love, love, love your posts and this one is no exception. I can absolutely agree with ALL of these people. One of my pet peeves are interrupters. That drives me completely CRAZY! No big deal if you interrupt once in a while, but when one constantly does it, I just want to slap them. Slap 'em good:-) Usually those people are also Know-it-alls and/or Braggarts. Awesome post, pretty lady!

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    1. Katie! I totally agree with you about the interrupters----that's a good one and they drive me crazy, too! Although if you talk to my teen son, he will confirm that he thinks I interrupt him far too often, ha-ha!

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