Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Wacky Wednesday Writers: Guest Post by My Daily Jenn-ism

     I am so excited to have Jenn from http://mydailyjenn-ism.blogspot.com as my second guest on the Wacky Wednesday Writer's series! Jenn is a very kind and special lady who goes that extra mile to promote new bloggers with her invaluable support. She has a big heart along with a great sense of humor, and I absolutely adore her! I refer to Jenn as my "sunshine" for all the smiles and virtual cups of coffee she sends me across the internet each day. Her blog is a mixture of humorous and poignant posts written straight from the heart. She is one of the most courageous women I know, tackling painful issues with brutal honesty and touching the lives of those who follow her blog. Please welcome this beautiful lady to my site and be sure to check out her blog!


Before I begin my blog, I'd like to thank my dear, sweet friend Marcia, the Menopausal Mother, ever so much for asking me to be a part of Wacky Wednesday!  I am so honored to be a part of this and to be in such amazing company.
Thank you again for your support of me and my blog....  I now give you....

Rah, Rah, Siss, Boom... Hit the Bottle:  A Cheer Mom's Saga


I'm a cheer mom.
Uttering those words even in print makes me shudder and want to quickly seek out the nearest wine bottle and add a straw.
Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with cheering.  In elementary school, I was a cheerleader.  I think it's great for the girls to build team spirit and bond on a different level.
Our cheer program, as competitive cheer leaders begins in August and ends sometime in February.  All the kids and moms are in each others faces constantly.  That's not always a bad thing - but it is a lot of "quality time" spent together on fields and in bleachers.
My problem....  The moms.
I have a very low bullshit tolerance.  I hate drama.  I hate nonsense and I especially hate it when it spills over to the kids on some level.  I do not keep my mouth shut when it becomes enough.


Every year it's something new and different - and the drama isn't really "about" the kids.  It's about the parental insecurities and the "what about my kid" nonsense.  It drives me nuts and remaining quiet is not my strong suit.
One year it was rapid fire email of nonsense and perpetual "reply all" to things that had nothing to do with me or my kid.  I don't need to know.  Another year it's parental sensitivity of "why not my kid".  For God's sake - these kids are in each other's faces enough... not every kid needs to be involved in every single play date, sleep over, picture moment, trip to the zoo.. whatever...  Give it a rest!  
Three quarters of the time... this is the problem with these programs.  The parents... strike that...  the MOMS.  The ones trying to live vicariously through their children & recapture moments of their childhood that they've lost - or that they didn't participate in for one reason or another....

Um... Helloooooo...  You're a little big for those pom poms... No??
Put your pom poms down, woman - before you break a hip...
Just sayin'.
I think as parents, we sometimes lose sight of what's real and what the kids really think about things that are going on.  Are they really tortured that Susie went to Janie's house with Bootsie & Bitsy?  Or is MOM upset that her child wasn't invited?  Are ALL the kids there and not your child??  Well then THAT would be a problem...  BUT if there are 30 kids and 4 are together... what's the problem??  Why the drama??  Why stir the pot to create a situation that DOES NOT exist??
Is my kid invited to every single play date and involved in every single thing that someone else is doing??  No...and that's OK.
If I make a big deal of it THEN she thinks something is wrong & she worries something is wrong.
Why create a problem where none exists?
It's about the kids!
As parents, our job is to support the kids - not cram false ideals down their throats or give them things to feel insecure about... Kids are totally insecure on their own.  It's OUR job as parents to lift them up and tell them how awesome they ALL are.  Especially during the moments where they may feel left out of something.
Save the drama for your momma....

This momma may or may not have a big ol water bottle full of Merlot to get through the season.
Rah Rah Siss Boom - hit the bottle...
Hic-up :)
~Jenn



Hey there!  I’m Jenn from My Daily Jenn-ism.
I’m a married mom of 3.  I’m a total Jersey Girl!  Real Jersey, not the crap you see on TV.  My husband and I have been married for 12 years.  I’m proud to say he is the love of my life.  We are on round two of “short ones.”  We have one biological child together and one foster child we are in the process of adopting.
I’m a very proud military momma of a 20 year old son, who serves in the US Navy.  My son is my heart!
I’ve been blogging for two years.  I initially started blogging to release my creativity so I could finish at least one of the books I’d been working on for the past 5 years.  It instead became an outlet where I can help people with the good, the bad and the ugly that life throws at you.
I’ve got a little bit of everything in my blog from what it’s like to be a foster parent, to living with lupus, to being a survivor of suicide x2, to parenting, to just life “stuff” or total goofiness.
Don’t be scared… It only sounds dark and brooding.  Truth is I’m a total goofball who will always seek out the silver lining and just laugh at life.
I’ve been through a lot, but I’ve learned that God really does give you things for a reason – and every crappy moment can be used for good to help another.  That has been something that I try to do as often as possible.
…um, make lemonade??
Life is short – so it’s all about finding the good in every second.  There’s always something good.
Please feel free to come and visit me both on my blog page:  My Daily Jenn-ism

42 comments:

  1. I say AMEN to all about the cheer moms. Talk about arrested development with some of them...

    And I'm head over to Jenn's blog now. Thanks for hosting her today!

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    1. Jenn is awesome and I'm so happy to have her here today!

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  2. I keep losing my comments!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Love this series - and LOVED this post - heading over to introduce myself to Jenn now
    Have a great day
    Yay - GO - sis boom bah
    XOXO

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    1. Glad you like the series, Suzan. I might just might have to ask you to come on board the wacky party train here!

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  3. Oh how true this is! Thanks for a great read and laugh this morning!

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    1. Jenn is fabulous! Thanks for making her feel welcome!

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  4. I have done (am doing!) stints as orchestra mom, hockey mom, and of course, drama mama -- and you've captured the dynamic perfectly! Bravo to you for telling it like it is!

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    1. You're a busy woman! Do you ever get any rest???

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    2. Thank you! It's a tough job... but we mom folk can handle it :)

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  5. As we say in my family of drama majors, "Leave the drama on the stage!" Life's tough enough for our chicklets without adding our own long-pent-up angst to the mixture. Cheer for your kids, moms. Just don't CHEER for your kids.
    Wonderful post! Heading over to make your acquaintance! :)

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    1. You are so correct, Diane. Wise words--leave the drama on the stage!

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    2. A.M.E.N. I'm going to remember that... leave the drama on the stage :) Thank you for coming to my page! It's a pleasure to meet you!

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  6. When my kids were little my husband coached their baseball team one year. And let me tell you how much worse it was than just having a kid on the team. My husband was about the fun and learning some skills, not necessarily winning at the price of making certain kids sit out cause they weren't as good as others. Well, some parents complained when their more athletic kid had to give the others a chance to play. Some parents complained when a more athletic kid played an inning that was longer than the inning their less athletic kid was in. No one was ever happy, especially me. If some parents showed even HALF the maturity level of their own kids . . .

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  7. Parents seem to forget it's about the kids... sadly this is why I stopped being an advisor a few years back.

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  8. Great post Jenn, and so true! Wow there are so many times that I'd just like to bop some of those parents!

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    1. Some parents need a good bop on the head! :) Thank you for reading AND for commenting!! xoxo

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  9. Hi Jenn. I think I can relate to you and followed you as above. Great story about the problems with the mommies with pom poms. Also, I love your images and if you made them I need a class on how did Jenn do that.

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    1. Thank you so much for your comment, Sue!! Sadly, I have borrowed my artwork. If only I were so crafty and creative :)

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  10. I was never a cheerleader mom, but I spent a lot of years as room mother, team mother, and den mother for our three kids. Some of the parents... i.e. MOMS... were pains in the patootie then, and it's a shame some of them still are. Great post, Jenn. Nice to meet you.

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    1. Isn't it crazy?? We're moms too, you'd think other moms would just cut some slack and relax. "Why can we all just get along????" :) Thank you so much for reading and commenting!! Thrilled to meet you :)

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  11. I really enjoyed your post! =)
    Being almost 53...I can relate to some of the things you mentioned.

    I agree...Life is short, you gotta have fun while you can!

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    1. Absolutely, life is entirely to short to sweat the silliness!! Thank you so much for reading and commenting :)

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  12. Funny post! Enjoyed reading about the pom-pom moms!

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  13. I totally agree that parents need to stop living through their children... it is their children's life... I live my own.. Cute post, made me smile :)

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  14. Thank you, Sadee! I'm thrilled to meet you :)

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  15. Thank you all so much for your comments!! I'm so overwhelmed.... I'd have responded sooner, but Cheer Mom was where else?? Cheer practice!!! <3

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  16. I love this, and I especially love you spreading the word that we should be building our kids up. They ARE insecure when they're in their younger years, and as our parents why wouldn't we??? But a lot of people do not.

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    1. Thank you :) I'm all about the kids... they're mostly way nicer than the adults :)

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  17. Oh how true is this! It's not just cheer moms that behave like this unfortunately. I'm with you, I don't have the patience for this! It's not like not being invited to some playdate is going to change your life and the kid isn't even going to remember it next year! Parents need to get a grip!

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    1. Agreed! I am so glad my kids are older now though and I don't have to go through this stuff anymore. Whew!

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  18. Popping by to see how you are doing :)

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    1. Hey--can you send me your blog link? I wasn't able to visit it!

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  19. http://thesimplelife2017.blogspot.com/

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  20. This is great! Love that you're outspoken and tell it like it is! As a fan of the "hic" hang outs...it helps to unwind! tee hee..

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  21. Good gods, Jenn, you're making me want to rip my own brain out of my head! I can't *stand* overly-involved mothers like this...particularly aging has-beens whose children MUST fulfill their unfulfilled dreams or whatever - whether it's the boy playing sports or the girl who's a pom-pom girl or whatever...young girls are crazy enough as it is, the last thing they need are crazy-ass mothers just making everything worse.

    I never had kids, nor was I into this stuff when I was younger but...I saw it go on. I saw it happening. Cheerleading sounds to me like a special sort of hell if you're not a Queen Bee type.

    I imagine you must have a giant wine cask in your cellar to deal with all this :)

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    1. I've seen my share of these types of moms, too. They're horrid and cause a person to want to consume copious amounts of wine on a daily basis!

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  22. It's obvious that some mothers have nothing better to do with themselves, so they create drama in order to have a life. It's always a shame when the kids get stuck in the crossfire when all they want to do is play games with their mates.

    Now Jenn, I know you can help this whole situation out. All you have to do is share that water bottle of Merlot with those mums and you'll see the whole atmosphere change, ha ha ha.

    Loved the post.

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    1. Good point, RPD. Merlot would make all the moms relaxed and happier!

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    2. lol I just caught this!! You're SO right!! Should get super sized cups of Merlot and hand them out!! Such a shame that people can't be secure about themselves at an older age to let their kids live their own lives!

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