Friday, March 30, 2018

Living The Writer's Dream, One Dirty Sock At A Time

      It's hard to be taken seriously as a writer these days. When people see me driving a sixteen-year-old minivan with missing hubcaps, they assume the only writing I do is the grocery list. Contrary to what my neighbors might think, I'm not unemployed, nor do I hibernate on the couch to watch Game Of Thrones for hours on while binge-eating fun-size candy bars. I actually do work, which means I spend an inordinate amount of my time staring at a blank computer screen while trying to think of something clever to write. My desk faces a window, so I'm easily distracted by the mating ritual of squirrels and the numerous dogs that mark their territory on my front lawn. I'm also privy to the people who don't bother to pick up their precious animal's poo. Yeah, I'm looking at you, Mrs. Rosenbaum, and your scrawny Shih Tzu, too.

     Luckily, I have a family that supports my writing, even though my career often sabotages my intentions of running an efficient home. I can't remember the last time I ironed a shirt or used the vacuum, which explains why there are dust balls the size of Arizona tumbleweeds rolling across my floor. The dirty clothes in the laundry room are multiplying faster than a pack of feral cats, and I'm certain there's a colony of orphaned socks hiding behind the dryer.

     Some days I'm plagued by writer's block, and all I have to show after sitting at my desk for six hours is a daisy chain made of paper clips. But on a good day with enough coffee to fuel the creative spirit, my muse goes into overdrive and there's no stopping me. This also means there is no time to make dinner, and my family is forced to forage in the freezer for whatever unidentifiable food they find entombed in plastic containers. It's amazing what they can create with stale hotdog buns and a bag of frozen carrots that were purchased when President Bush was in office.

     There are other times when I'm so engrossed in my writing that I forget to shower and shave, which accounts for the increased Yeti sightings in our area. My disheveled appearance is a testament to the hours I spend at the keyboard, although it's tough explaining this to my husband, the mailman, and my embarrassed teens when their friends catch me in my cereal-stained bathrobe at 4:00 p.m. It's all part of living the writer's dream, although no one warned me that I'd also become proficient at tuning out Fetty Wap blasting from my kid's room, or ignoring the temperamental toilet that's flooding my bathroom floor. The minivan needs an oil change and the dogs are overdue for their yearly deworming, but as a writer, I can see beauty in all the chaos. Tumbleweeds and toilet rings be damned----I'm embracing the writer's life wholeheartedly, one dirty sock at a time.





***WANT MORE MENO MAMA? I have a NEW post up on Robot Butt this week: "12 Things To Keep You Busy While You're Unemployed"---you can read it here: http://www.robotbutt.com/2018/03/24/12-things-keep-busy-youre-unemployed/ Also, on Pickle Fork this week: "The Little White Lies Men Tell Themselves": https://medium.com/pickle-fork/the-little-white-lies-men-tell-themselves-a2aff92047e2 AND.... another poem on P.S. I Love You: "Winter In Fayette" https://psiloveyou.xyz/winter-in-fayette-ea35e8520c1c




















16 comments:

  1. Families of writers deserve awards. In fact anyone who steps into my house deserves an award... Humor is so difficult - but you have to admire a writer who submits to a site called Robot Butt.

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    1. Ha-Ha--true! I love Robot Butt--such a funny site!

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  2. Bwahahaha! All of the above!
    My Husby does deserve a medal. For example: I'm in here writing and I can smell deliciousness coming from the kitchen. Mmmmmmm...

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    1. Ooooh send him over to my place to cook dinner so that we don't have to eat stale hotdogs!

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  3. It's time your kids learned to do the wash. At least the socks won't be on your to-do list!

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    1. Ha-Ha so true. They can do the dishes too, while they're at it.

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  4. Hire a cleaning woman, buy new socks and write on!

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  5. Oh, yes, I can so identify with this! Blessed to have a husband who's retired and loves to cook. On the other hand, the bathrooms plead for help and the dust bunnies are reproducing. Ack! Have to take a break from reading/writing to attend to these. Well, not so bad as long as I can listen to some enlightening radio while doing the chores.
    I've subscribed to your blog, and hope you will visit me soon at https://marthaorlando.blogspot.com
    Blessings!

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    1. Thank you, Martha. I agree---music helps when it comes to tackling chores!

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  6. YES. You described me as well, minus children at home (just the one man hehe). It's amazing what you can ignore while in the creative zone. This: " I actually do work, which means I spend an inordinate amount of my time staring at a blank computer screen while trying to think of something clever to write." Haha, exactly! Fabulous post, Marcia.

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  7. Everything else can wait, but the flow of thoughts when struck a writer must be penned immediately :)
    You're one amazing writer. Waiting to get one of your books soon!!
    Keep writing pleaseee :)

    Happy Easter to you and family.

    Epsita | www.thepositivewindow.com

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    1. Awwww thank you so much---you are so kind. Happy Easter!

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  8. I can relate a little to this. I'm not a full time writer, but I do stare at the screen sometimes. It has been my experience that family members are pretty tolerant when Momma is happy. Those times when the words flow are energizing and edifying, and put us in a good mood. I'm so glad that you have chosen to embrace the writer's life, as I am a direct beneficiary:)

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  9. A writer's life is tough. Don't worry about those tumbleweeds, just open the door and they'll eventually roll out. :)

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